Travelling with children

[LadyMac]

I read Anita's travel column today with a small amount of alarm.

My mother, son (12 years old) and I are travelling to the Netherlands and Germany in April. My son's father (my ex-husband) is not in our lives. In fact, he hasn't been around for the past 7 years or so. I have full custody of my son. A signed "permission to travel" letter isn't going to happen ~ I don't even know for sure where my ex lives.

I can bring a copy of my divorce decree. Is there anything else I should bring with me? I guess I could always tell anyone who asks that I have no idea who my son's father is, but would rather not do that. :o

Thanks in advance!

[weblet]

If you have full custody, bring the court papers showing that. The divorce decree would back it up. You'll probably not be asked, but better safe than sorry...

[tdew]

It has also become much more difficult to obtain a new passport for children.
Both parents are expected to show up at the passport office with the child.
If for some reason one cannot be there, a notarized form has to be submitted.

I understand the need for these rules, but it does make things more complicated in cases of divorce, etc.

[jfrenaye]

If the father is unreachable, you can also have a statement made by you to that fact, notarized.

To be honest, (and I have not read Anits's column yet) the only place I have had an issue with traveling with my three kids (all of them or just a portion) has been Mexico and that was on the US side before we left.

My kids all have passports and I always have a signed letter from their mom to be safe, but I have honestly never been questioned and we have done Europe fairly extensively, China, most of the Caribbean, Mexico, and Japan.

John

[tdew]

Originally posted by jfrenaye@Mar 17 2006, 09:54 AM
My kids all have passports and I always have a signed letter from their mom to be safe, but I have honestly never been questioned and we have done Europe fairly extensively, China, most of the Caribbean, Mexico, and Japan.

John
22445

Hi John,

We've been questioned when traveling with grandchildren a few times, mostly when returning to the US. When leaving Amsterdam and even returning from Niagara Falls last year, I was really glad that in addition to passports, we had a note from their mother saying it was okay for them to travel with us. Now it should probably be one from both parents and be notarized. Coming from Mexico they weren't concerned with whether the kids were permitted to travel with us, they wanted a birth certificate or passport to show that the kids were also US citizens.

[weblet]

It is my understanding that if one parent has full custody it does not matter what the other parent thinks, says, does. One could clarify that, however, with a lawyer who specializes in custody cases....

[LadyMac]

Originally posted by weblet@Mar 17 2006, 11:32 AM
It is my understanding that if one parent has full custody it does not matter what the other parent thinks, says, does.* One could clarify that, however, with a lawyer who specializes in custody cases....
22457


Good idea. I will contact my divorce lawyer and get her take on the situation.

Thanks for the suggestion.

[LadyMac]

Originally posted by jfrenaye@Mar 17 2006, 09:54 AM
If the father is unreachable, you can also have a statement made by you to that fact, notarized.

I believe he's in hiding from the "authorities". :blink: Let's just say he doesn't like paying income taxes, child support, traffic tickets.....

So I will go armed with my divorce decree and hope there is not a problem. Thanks for your input.

[weblet]

Originally posted by LadyMac@Mar 17 2006, 11:50 AM
I believe he's in hiding from the "authorities".* :blink:* Let's just say he doesn't like paying income taxes, child support, traffic tickets.....

So I will go armed with my divorce decree and hope there is not a problem.* Thanks for your input.
22462


Not just the divorce decree as that does not show who got custody of the kiddies. Bring the custody papers.

[Cindy]

My granddaughters father is also missing in action and has been since right after she was born..My granddaughter was selected as a student ambassador and will be traveling to Europe this summer..
We had to get her a passport and John is right, my daughter just had to write a letter explaining that he is unreachable and has not been a part of her life since right after birth, and have it notorized, they accepted that without much problem..
She is 11 yrs old and has never met her real dad, he only saw her right after she was born and my daughter has since remarried and the only father my granddaughter has known is her step dad..
Hope by now you have the problem resolved..

[LadyMac]

Originally posted by Cindy@Apr 8 2006, 04:52 PM
My granddaughters father is also missing in action and has been since right after she was born..My granddaughter was selected as a student ambassador and will be traveling to Europe this summer..
We had to get her a passport and John is right, my daughter* just had to write a letter explaining that he is unreachable and has not been a part of her life since right after birth, and have it notorized, they accepted that without much problem..
She is 11 yrs old and has never met her real dad, he only saw her right after she was born and my daughter has since remarried and the only father my granddaughter has known is her step dad..
Hope by now you have the problem resolved..
24044


Actually, we travel this Thursday, so I will know for sure by then!

I have a copy teste of my divorce decree which states the custody situation. I used the same document when getting my son's passport, so I think I should be okay.

My feeling is that this situation must not be unusual. I certainly don't mind a little bit of extra hassle, if it means making sure kids are with the people they are supposed to be with!

Thanks to everyone for their advice and comments!

[weblet]

You should be fine. Have a great trip!! :)

[jjjenny]

I flew from the US to German with my two daughters and didn't have a problem. Hope you have a great trip.

[mercwyn]

Originally posted by tdew@Mar 17 2006, 07:44 AM
It has also become much more difficult to obtain a new passport for children.
Both parents are expected to show up at the passport office with the child.
If for some reason one cannot be there, a notarized form has to be submitted.

I understand the need for these rules, but it does make things more complicated in cases of divorce, etc.
22442


What is required for children under 14 is one of the following; both parents present themselves, along with the child, at the passport office at the time that the application is being made or one parent shows up and has a notorized form (it's on the US State Dept. website) from the other parent granting permission to get the passport (or to renew it) or if the parent has sole custody then that parent must bring in the supporting documents showing that he or she has sole custody.

It is slightly harder but it is something that can be done. I can attest to that since I had to do it this past October for my daughter.

[LadyMac]

Just wanted to check-in ~ flew from IAD to AMS and back in April. I had my divorce decree which showed the custody situation for my 12 year old son. No one asked me about his father, no one gave me a glance, asked to see my paperwork or paid the slightest attention to us.

Just goes to show that being prepared counts! And yes, I also believe that if you bring your umbrella, it will not rain! :lol:

[Ned]

Originally posted by LadyMac@May 5 2006, 03:09 PM
Just wanted to check-in ~ flew from IAD to AMS and back in April.* I had my divorce decree which showed the custody situation for my 12 year old son.* No one asked me about his father, no one gave me a glance, asked to see my paperwork or paid the slightest attention to us.*

Just goes to show that being prepared counts!* And yes, I also believe that if you bring your umbrella, it will not rain!* :lol:
25744

Or boots, and it won't snow? B) I always take a fold up umbrella with me on vacation. It doesn't seem to help much. Do you think it's me, or the umbrella?

In all seriousness, I'm glad you had no problem, but I've seen custodial parents in the same situation as you, get all kinds of static at the airport, because they weren't prepared with the right documentation.

[mercwyn]

I completely agree with Ned, when I worked at an airport some years ago a great many people were turned away for not having the necessary documents to travel with their children. It is far better to be safe then sorry.

[Ned]

Originally posted by mercwyn@May 6 2006, 01:25 PM
I completely agree with Ned, when I worked at an airport some years ago a great many people were turned away for not having the necessary documents to travel with their children.* It is far better to be safe then sorry.
25773

As a soccer coach I have taken the kids on my teams with me, with a minimum of chaperones (5 parental chaperones for 18 kids plus me and one assistant), out of the country. The paperwork we carry under those circumstances is absolutely amazing, even if we're just popping up to one of the wonderful summer tournaments just north of the border in Canada. It's also interesting that 99% of the potential border crossing problems are in the US, both in trying to get out and returning, as well. They make the problems with the airlines seem like an absolute cakewalk.

[Ned]

Originally posted by Ned@May 6 2006, 10:39 PM
As a soccer coach I have taken the kids on my teams with me, with a minimum of chaperones (5 parental chaperones for 18 kids plus me and one assistant), out of the country.* The paperwork we carry under those circumstances is absolutely amazing, even if we're just popping up to one of the wonderful summer tournaments just north of the border in Canada.* It's also interesting that 99% of the potential border crossing problems are in the US, both in trying to get out and returning, as well.* They make the problems with the airlines seem like an absolute cakewalk.
25787

I just found out than an acquaintance of mine from soccer was flying with her two sons to San Juan from PHL last week.

She's divorced with full custody. He has visitation rights. It was a bitter divorce. There were allegations of abuse. I don't know exactly what happened at the airport with regard to what was alleged, about she and the boys leaving for Puerto Rico, however, I did find out she didn't bring her paperwork with her to the airport. They missed the flight completely. They finally left two days later. The airline wasn't particularly forgiving about the missed flight and she had to pay a lot extra for the new flight down two days later.

I can't suggest enough that you need to bring your paperwork with you on trips.

[weblet]

That's interesting, Ned, considering Puerto Rico is not considered "leaving the country"...

[Ned]

Originally posted by weblet@May 10 2006, 01:10 PM
That's interesting, Ned, considering Puerto Rico is not considered "leaving the country"...
26014

My cousin always took her papers with her flying with her daughters anywhere, even when flying from PHL to ORD. She got full custody and her ex got supervised visitation, which he never exercised, by the way. Her ex was a real jerk, and there was a fear that he would try to stop her from even leaving the state through a temporary injuction, just when she was about to leave on a trip with the girls, because he would then have difficulty in using his visitation rights. Over the years he filed many groundless suits to try to make her life a living hell. Her attorney advised her to just take the papers with her just in case to prove she had full custody.

As to the lady going to Puerto Rico, I wouldn't depend on the knowledge or behavior of the folks at the airport for a second, with regard to this issue. All you have to do is get an angry divorced father, who wanted custody of his own kids and didn't get it, who's on the desk, and without papers you can run into trouble. Whether its right or wrong, the law or not, doesn't seem to matter much these days. For example, specious suits, without any merit whatsoever, seem to make there way in the courts all the time these days, when they should have been thrown out immediately. Another problem is that many folks don't seem to know Puerto Rico is part of the US.

[weblet]

many folks don't seem to know Puerto Rico is part of the US

What an understatement! :lol: :lol:

[LadyMac]

Originally posted by Ned@May 10 2006, 07:46 PM
My cousin always took her papers with her flying with her daughters anywhere, even when flying from PHL to ORD.* She got full custody and her ex got supervised visitation, which he never exercised, by the way.* Her ex was a real jerk, and there was a fear that he would try to stop her from even leaving the state through a temporary injuction, just when she was about to leave on a trip with the girls, because he would then have difficulty in using his visitation rights.* Over the years he filed many groundless suits to try to make her life a living hell.* Her attorney advised her to just take the papers with her just in case to prove she had full custody.* 26041


We could be related... your cousin's ex sounds just like mine! :lol:

[Ned]

Originally posted by LadyMac@May 11 2006, 09:12 AM
We could be related... your cousin's ex sounds just like mine!* :lol:
26065

I'm very sorry to hear that!